Lately, I’ve been having a lot of trouble forcing myself to write. I often state that writing is never easy, and I’ll still stand by that comment, but in the end I do manage to maintain a blog with an average of over five hundred words per day. I get it done. Even on the days that suck. On the days that don’t, I get more done than I need to so that when the sucky days come, I don’t have to deal with it.
These past few weeks haven’t had any easy days, however. There’s no reason for it. With everything that’s been going on with my life, you’d think writing would be easier as of late, but that hasn’t. If there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that getting into the “writing zone” isn’t influenced by anything I can pinpoint. I can say that I know how productive a day is going to be for me based on how I wake up that morning, and I haven’t had a good day in over two weeks now.
It sucks, but you can’t force it. I can force myself to change my mood, but I can’t force myself to want to write. Sometimes the pressure of blog deadlines helps, but on the terrible days, even that won’t work.
When that happens, I’ve come to accept the fact that not every day can be one you’re proud of. Some days will be bad. Some days will be slow. Some days you don’t even have the willpower to get out of bed. That’s fine. But making yourself feel bad about those days isn’t fine. We all have them.
The thing to keep in mind here is your mindset. If you want to be productive, but can’t bring yourself to do it, that’s good. That just means it’s not the right day. If you’re not being productive and don’t care, that’s different. It’s the desire that’s the important part. Now, I realize this isn’t a universal thing, as many professions require being productive whether or not you want it, but drive is important.
If you have the personal drive to work even though you don’t want to, and aren’t getting paid for it, that should telegraph a message to you and those around you. There’s no incentive there. You’re doing work because you know you should and for no other reason. It’s a lot easier to convince somebody to pay you for something if you can prove you’re not only doing it for the money.
So, when I don’t get as much done as I had wanted to that day, I try not to get upset. I could have just as easily gotten nothing done that day and the only substantial result would be how it made me feel. The only profit I get from this blog is the satisfaction it give me, along with the writing practice I know I’m accumulating. If I suddenly stop making new posts, the only thing that will change is how I feel about myself. I can’t stop now. Days may not be easy, but even subpar results are still results.